Song of the Millenium (Thus Far)
Fantastic lyrics to ‘Thou Shalt Always Kill’ by Dan Le Sac vs. Scroobious Pip (link is to Youtube video, well worth checking out for the mighty beard) :
Thou shalt not steal if there is direct victim.
Thou shalt not worship pop idols or follow lost prophets.
Thou shalt not take the names of Johnny Cash, Joe Strummer, Johnny Hartman, Desmond Decker, Jim Morrison, Jimi Hendrix or Syd Barret in vain.
Thou shalt not think that any male over the age of 30 that plays with a child that is not their own is a paedophile… Some people are just nice.
Thou shalt not read NME.
Thall shalt not stop liking a band just because they’ve become popular.
Thou shalt not question Stephen Fry.
Thou shalt not judge a book by it’s cover.
Thou shalt not judge Lethal Weapon by Danny Glover.
Thall shalt not buy Coca-Cola products. Thou shalt not buy Nestle products.
Thou shalt not go into the woods with your boyfriend’s best friend, take drugs and cheat on him.
Thou shalt not fall in love so easily.
Thou shalt not use poetry, art or music to get into girls’ pants. Use it to get into their heads.
Thou shalt not watch Hollyoakes.
Thou shalt not attend an open mic and leave as soon as you’re done just because you’ve finished your sh*tty little poem or song you self-righteous pr*ck.
Thou shalt not return to the same club or bar week in, week out just ’cause you once saw a girl there that you fancied but you’re never gonna f*cking talk to.Thou shalt not put musicians and recording artists on ridiculous pedestals no matter how great they are or were.
The Beatles - Were just a band.
Led Zepplin - Just a band.
The Beach Boys - Just a band.
The Sex Pistols - Just a band.
The Clash - Just a band.
Crass - Just a band.
Minor Threat - Just a band.
The Cure - Just a band.
The Smiths - Just a band.
Nirvana - Just a band.
The Pixies - Just a band.
Oasis - Just a band.
Radiohead - Just a band.
Bloc Party - Just a band.
The Arctic Monkeys - Just a band.
The next big thing - JUST A BAND.Thou shalt give equal worth to tragedies that occur in non-English speaking countries as to those that occur in English speaking countries.
Thou shalt remember that guns, bitches and bling were never part of the four elements and never will be.Thou shalt not make repetitive generic music
Thou shalt not make repetitive generic music
Thou shalt not make repetitive generic music
Thou shalt not make repetitive generic music
Thou shalt not pimp my ride.
Thou shalt not scream if you wanna go faster.
Thou shalt not move to the sound of the wickedness.
Thou shalt not make some noise for Detroit.
When I say “Hey” thou shalt not say “Ho”.
When I say “Hip” thou shalt not say “Hop”.
When I say “he say, she say, we say, make some noise” - kill me.
Thou shalt not quote me happy.
Thou shalt not shake it like a polaroid picture.
Thou shalt not wish your girlfriend was a freak like me.
Thou shalt spell the word “Pheonix” P-H-E-O-N-I-X not P-H-O-E-N-I-X, regardless of what the Oxford English Dictionary tells you.
Thou shalt not express your shock at the fact that Sharon got off with Bradley at the club last night by saying “Is it”.
Thou shalt think for yourselves.And thou shalt always kill.
June 21st, 2007 at 10:53 am
a) What’s wrong with coca cola products? They may be overly sweet & acidic, aggressively marketed at kids, and have annoying adverts, but they make vodka taste good!
b) Does it make me a bad person that I don’t know anything by Crass or Minor Threat?
c) I like phoenix as it is.
d) Respect to the beard.
June 22nd, 2007 at 7:31 am
a) Maybe he objects to the fact that, like me when I was young, his Dad always wanted to take his teeth off him and perform a rotting experiment overnight in Coke, rather than letting him put them under his pillow for the tooth fairy?
b) Me either. Apparently Crass were an influential English anarchist Punk rock band, whilst Minor Threat were an American hardcore punk band who formed the basis for the Straight Edge movement. So now we know.
c) I think you mean ‘I like pheonix as it is’.
d) Indeed.
June 24th, 2007 at 7:37 am
a) I’m sorry for everyone’s fathers tormenting them when young, you should have sold him the teeth. Anyway, I remember carrying out that experiment at school, cola rots it a bit and turns it brown, but the tooth in orange juice was in a far worse state by the next day. If only juices marketed themselves as cynically, they could rot so many more kids teeth.
b) After reading up on those 2 bands, I could fully understand putting them on ridiculous pedestals. They were obviously far more than just bands, in some cases creating philosophical schools of thought, movements and ways of life. Well, certain band members did.
c) No. I like phoenix. Bitch.
June 25th, 2007 at 12:34 am
Re: (c), I could get behind just spelling it “phenix”. Why the ‘o’ at all?
June 26th, 2007 at 12:10 pm
After a very brief search I found these US place names:
Phoenix, Arizona
Phoenix, Illinois
Phoenix, Maryland
Phoenix, New York
Phoenix, Oregon
Phoenixville, Pennsylvania
Phenix City, Alabama.
So you’re not alone, there are definitely some Alabamians who got behind it.